Sure, you thought you already knew that. But now we have proof! After countless hours of surveys and studies on the following topics, these facts have emerged.|
First of all, a man does not call a relationship a relationship. He refers to it as "that time when me and Susie were doing it on a semi- regular basis.
When a relationship ends, a woman will cry and pour her heart out to her girlfriends, and she will write a poem called "All Men Are Idiots." Then she will get on with her life.
A man has a little more trouble letting go. Six months after the breakup, at 3:00am on a Saturday night, he will call and say, "I just wanted to let you know you ruined my life, and I'll never forgive you, and I hate you, and you're a total floozy. But I want you to know that there's always a chance for us." This is known as the "I Hate You/I Love You" drunken phone call, that 99% of all men have made at least once. There are community colleges that offer courses to help men get over this need; alas, these classes rarely prove effective.
Women mature much faster than men. Most 17-year-old females can function as adults. Most 17-year-old males are still trading baseball cards and giving each other wedgies after gym class. This is why high school romances rarely work out.
To their credit, men do not decorate their penmanship. They just chicken- scratch. Women use scented, colored stationary and they dot their "i's" with circles or hearts. Women use ridiculously large loops in their "p's" and "g's". It is a royal pain to read a note from a woman. Even when she's dumping you, she'll put a smiley-face at the end of the note.
A woman makes a list of things she needs and then goes to the store and buys these things. A man waits until the only items left in his 'fridge are half a lime and some mold. Then he goes grocery shopping. He buys everything that looks good. By the time that a man reaches the checkout counter, his cart is packed tighter than the Clampett's car on Beverly Hillbillies. Of course, this will not stop him from going to the 10- items-or-less lane.
When a man says he is ready to go out, it means he is ready to go out. When a woman says she is ready to go out, it means she WILL be ready to go out, just as soon as she finds her earring, finishes putting on her makeup....
Let's say a man and a woman are watching a boxing match on TV. One of the boxers is felled by a low blow. The woman says, "Oh, gee. That must hurt." The man doubles over and actually FEELS the pain.
Sent by a Friend.
Source : Unknown