"God," said Adam, "why did you make Eve so beautiful?"

"So you would love her."

"But why did you make her so dumb?"

"So she would love you."

HEAVEN IS WHEN YOU HAVE :
An American Salary
A British Home
Chinese Food
An Indian Wife

HELL IS WHEN YOU HAVE :
An American Wife
British Food
A Chinese Home
An Indian Salary

"William, I just won the lottery! Pack your bags!"

"That's great, honey! Should I pack for the beach, the mountains, or what?"

"Who cares? Just get out."

A new teacher was trying to make use of her psychology courses. She started her class by saying, "Everyone who thinks you're stupid, stand up!"

After a few seconds, Little Johnny stood up. The teacher said, "Do you think you're stupid, Little Johnny?"

"No, ma'am, but I hate to see you standing there all by yourself!"

A political man to a woman, "You look beautiful today!!!!"

The woman replied, "Thanks, but unfortunately I could not say the same about you."

"Sure you could!!" said the political man, "if you could lie as well as I do!"

ROMANCE MATHEMATICS

Smart man + smart woman = romance
Smart man + dumb woman = affair
Dumb man + smart woman = marriage

Benazir Bhutto To Nawaz Sharief: "if you were my husband I'd put poison in your lassi."

"Benazir," replied Nawaz, "if I were your husband I'd drink that lassi."

Amitabh is questioning a guy on KBC.

He asks him "Meri company ka naam kya hain?"
Options : TISCO, Wipro, ABCL, Reliance.

The guys says "ABCL"
Amitabh asks "Sure, confident?"
The guys says " yes confident"
Amitabh says "Computerji ABCL ko tala laga do"
The computer replies "Abe gadhe ABCL ko 2 saal se tala laga hua hai !"

A guy was typing away at his home computer, when his six- year-old daughter sneaked up behind him.

Suddenly, she turned and ran into the kitchen, squealing to the rest of the family, "I know Daddy's password! I know Daddy's password!"

"What is it?" her sisters asked eagerly.

Proudly she replied, "Asterisk, asterisk, asterisk, asterisk, asterisk!"

Windows is a thirty-two bit extension and graphical shell to a sixteen-bit patch to an eight-bit operating system originally coded for a four-bit micro-processor written by a two-bit company that couldn't stand one bit of competition.

A husband and his wife were sound asleep when suddenly the phone rang.

The husband picked up the phone and said, "Hello? How the heck do I know? What do I look like, a weatherman?" He then slammed the phone down and settled into bed.

"Who was that?" asked his wife.

"I don't know. It was some guy who wanted to know if the coast was clear."